Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Fuck you Bacteria

Many moons ago, Like 2 years ago I developed a rather moderate case of Staph infection on my legs, and my arm. It was probably the worse thing ever, considering I had tattoos on my legs and I was working in retail at the time with this horribly contagious crap making its home on my body. I was sick, my legs hurt and I didnt know what was going on. So after about 6 days it got worse and I went to the doctor after noticing my leg sores were oozing grossness everywhere. They said I had staph, and werent sure what kind of Staph, IE Normal or MRSA, but they threw medication at me and said shoo go away before you infect everyone else. Kinda made me feel horrible and dirty. I'm a rather clean person, who just happened to step into a lake for ten seconds and got the worst it could give me besides a crocodile or alligator jumping out of the water eating my face.  It sucked, I couldnt work for a week and people kept calling me in. I AM CONTAGIOUS.  Anyways....

I think I have another, though probably not as horrible as the last one since I caught this one early, their small, they hurt and it blows. So now I gotta tell the one I love "Hey, you cant touch me, I got this horrible disease" Great. I'm prone to staph infections since my last horrible one, and coupled with having this horrible sickness I've had for a week my immune system was weakened leaving this shit to attack. Fuck you Staph infection. Fuck you bacteria.


Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Oh shi- A Blog and Christmas

This was all of you after Christmas. Admit it.

So Christmas came and went, and my mom realized that I was a major nerd for some star wars. Yeah.....

I woke up and took this picture, it's nice how my hair stays that way
The madness. Oh the madness. I also got some giant Storm Trooper Pez dispenser that plays the Imperial March when you get some candy and doesn't shut up. But its ok, because it's awesome. And another nerdy moment I've been having, that even boyfriend called?   FUCKING POKEMANZ. My mom got me a DS XL I, so I skimmed past all the neato Mario games and picked up Pokemon to relive my awesome childhood since I miss my gameboy.

So thats all in this short ass blog.....

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Sometimes you feel like a Nut. Sometimes you dont

Fuck you have a camera

I love shoes
I cant sleep. And since I cant sleep, I will blog. I got my camera to function properly, which is always good.
On another note I started playing Dungeons and Dragons Unlimited because I am so bored with being back home. Dont judge me. Also die in a fire.


http://www.99rooms.com/99rooms.html
This shit is weird. Try it.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Oh Steve Wilkos and Day time TV

A Challenger Appears.

I havent been at home near a TV for almost two years, and I found that in my most redneck fashion I do enjoy me some Springer and Steve Wilkos. Now I can never look at Steve Wilkos normally ever again because he just looks like a super angry Mr. Clean, but probably less gay and more bald. I have to admit my love for Steve, his afinity for throwing chairs and yelling makes me swoon.

RAAAAAGE FACE

Another show I enjoy? Thanks to Susan bringing it up? Billy the Exterminator. Really? This show is the epitome of white trash that got a tv deal, and it makes me laugh with sheer glee!
This fox is really hoping he doesnt grow a mullet, get tips or have bling

Dear god.

WHO THE FUCK WEARS THIS WHEN FIGHTING GATORS? YOU SIR ARE A FAG
Please take your Affliction clothing, big hair, mullets and silver shiny shit and die in a fire. I only watch this show because I can only HOPE someone gets mauled by a fox, Tiger, Lion, Rabbit or something horrifying. TV, stop giving people deals for the shit they do. This show isnt as bad as Swamp People. The Media is running out of ideas for TV shows, but fortunately I can laugh at most of them. HA. HA. HA.

Oh and speaking of mullets:

You sir, take the cake. But it's ok, because I like Dog the Bounty Hunter. He is the one true mullet wearing, leather clad bad ass of TV shows. No one can beat him. No. One.

I'm the Dog. The Big Bad Dog.

OK Maybe that one wins too.





Catch you next time kiddies

Monday, December 20, 2010

I really had to pee

Behold my super thoughtful face. BEHOLD IT.

So Christmas is like a few days away. Normally I am excited about it, but for some reason I just aint feeling it lately. I got my mom the best gifts ever though, and I hope she loves them. She's the only one who I really shop for, mostly because I know anything I get her, she'll appreciate no matter what. Thats why I love my mommy.  So So much. But I'll probably find my Christmas Spirit in a few days.

Also, I fucking hate the mall during Christmas. I utterly hate it. The army has made me the kind of person that doesnt deal well with retards, or civillians. The army has also seemed to have weeded out shopping from my tiny female brain. I get frustrated when shit isn't in front of me, or I have to go look for it. Then I have to hear the bitching of other customers. Really? Does it matter how much threat count the sweater has? Its going to keep you warm, Find your size, shut the fuck up and BUY IT. But I dont say anything. One other rude thing? People who just walk right in front of you while you are walking. Granted now, due to this inconsiderate behavior I have learned to yell the word RUDE, or YOU ARE A FUCKING TARD at said people, it seems this just makes people wonder what they have done wrong, and they dont have the balls to really say anything. Another thing? Wild mad children running around freely while their parents ignore them. I found myself trying hard to not hit, trip or slap these children. One tripped me and it took all my will to not shove the kid on the ground. Little fuckers. Parents. BEAT YOUR KIDS. Fucking Hellions.

Also.... Military discounts. Give them to me. You are a communist if you refuse to give me one. I fight for your country to keep the terrorists from blowing shit up and the illegals in. But you will give the Senior Citizens a discount. Fuck old people

Fuck you.

Also I love this.
So thats my ranting for today. Sorry. But I dont care.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Finally..... Ketchup


So for a while now I've been meaning to post a blog about Ketchup. So here it is:

Everything about you Dear Fancy Ketchup makes you Godly.


This whole debate about ketchup started in my boyfriends truck as we were going somewhere. I was remembering how awesome Whataburger Fries are and how awesome their ketchup is, mainly because its "Fancy". I was upset to learn that the Whataburger in Tucson, Az had sub par fries and burgers. But the Ketchup was still fancy, which by default should have made the fries better. No. It never happened. It was made of fail and sadness. I wanted to throw my box of fries and fancy ketchup on the floor and cry to the heavens. "WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?"  But I didnt want to make a scene. So I ate my unsalty healthy fries with my Fancy Ketchup and cried.

Boyfriend told me that there is no difference in Fancy Whataburger Ketchup and normal Ketchup. He said all ketchup is "FANCY". I have now learned that the Term "Fancy Ketchup" is nothing more than a marketing ploy designed by Ketchup companies to get us, the consumer to believe that their ketchup is far superior than other brands and way fancier. Ya know what? Give that damn bottle a Monocle and a Cane, and some sweet ass mustache. Then You will have some fancy ketchup. DONT LIE TO ME!!!! That shit better have some fucking Cocaine in it.

I say sir......
So. This is the end of that portion of my blog, and I will break it up with an image.


I dyed my hair. So behold this.








Once upon a time...... I was a banana

I AM A BANANA

Well I'm home. On leave. For Christmas. I'm here until the 2nd of January. So if you wanna hang out, shoot me a text, my numbers on my facebook. I was up for 27 hours on Friday and I've pretty much slept my weekend away. Oh well.

I'm going to get my hair whacked off, its gonna look like this:

Yeah I know. Fuck you. I want hair I dont have to pull up.
I'm mostly getting it done so I dont have to pull it up in Uniform. I might dye it black. Who knows. I just go on a whim when I get my hair done. And I wanna look like a little boy.  I want my boyfriend to be afraid.

I think I'm done with this blog. I keep forgetting to write about Fancy Whataburger ketchup. What ever....

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Mr. Brightside!!!!!!111111


First I would like to start out with the image of the hour
Hi Horrible horrifying Ice Cream.


Secondly, I would like to write about a few things on my mind.

Recently I have been given antidepressants, which I will have to say, I'm glad I have them. Secondly, I was given a wonderful sedative called Advair or something I dont know, it's like Xanex. Makes me so nice and friendly. Like this:
"O Hai. I dont want to eat you, give me a hug"

As opposed to this:
"Die in a fire, and I will eat your children"

                   I think its good, and better for me. ALSO. I am leaving on Friday to come home for two weeks to visit my lovely friends. And Jake so happened to draw an Owl that I have claimed as mine. His name is George.

George is wondering why everyone is staring at him

I Plan on getting George getting tattooed on my arm with my Jakalope, since Steve is kinda lonely and Party Cat is a good ways away. I'm going to mess with his sketch to see if I cant figure something out that I can do with him. he's too adorable. And I do love me some owls. Cute little fuckers.

This was my early Christmas gift from the Boy. NOT THE PICTURE

Its SX 70 Polaroid. FROM THE '70s. And Steve.

MOAR STEVE. 

Monday, December 13, 2010

Frozen in time





I have these moments, where I find out information on a place, then I find the most iconic image that represents said place. But nothing speaks to me more than this ferris wheel.

Meet the Ferris Wheel. It never saw use in its life.
I have always held an interest in abandoned towns, and when I saw the image of this Ferris wheel standing alone amidst a backdrop of buildings that have been forgotten by man I was immediately attracted to it. There is something about a city lost in time, with the elements left to take it over. It speaks to me in such a way that only urban decay can.

The remnants of Chernobyl can be seen on the horizon.




Pripyat sits in Northern Ukraine and sits about 3Km from the Chernobyl plant itself.


Pripyat was a planned town and a factory town.  It was an artificial town that was built from scratch in 1970 for Chernobyl Nuclear Power plant workers. About 50,000 people lived in Pripyat before the Chernobyl incident in 1986.  Annual growth of population was estimated at around 1,500 including 800 new-born citizens and over 500 newcomers from all the corners of the Soviet Union. It was planned that the Prypiat's population should rise up to 78,000 in the nearest future. Prypiat had a railroad link to Kiev Yazov station as well as a navigable river nearby.  


Everything that was owned by the scientists families were left behind during the evacuation of the town during the Chernobyl disaster. 


That Ferris Wheel
Living Quarters

Utterly Horrifying



My love for such a town as this has to be this. We build. We destroy. We abandon with out much of a thought on what may come of a place. What comes to mind to me  is the Poem by Sara Teasdale "There Will Come Soft Rains" 

There will come soft rains and the smell of the ground,
And swallows circling with their shimmering sound;
And frogs in the pool singing at night,
And wild plum trees in tremulous white;

Robins will wear their feathery fire,
Whistling their whims on a low fence-wire;

And not one will know of the war, not one
Will care at last when it is done.

Not one would mind, neither bird nor tree,
If mankind perished utterly;

And Spring herself when she woke at dawn
Would scarcely know that we were gone.






All of these photos are from Pripyat. 




 Appreciate what you see, there's art in every nook and corner around the world. Not matter how beautiful, dark or foreboding a place looks, theres always a treasure. There's always something. The things we abandon will stand the test of time as nature takes back what was once her's. Pripyat is a fine example. A large town lost to radiation, but slowly being taken back by the earth. Its a beautiful process and for anyone to be allowed to photograph it, to see it with their own eyes. I envy them. I like to imagine taking my camera to Pripyat and taking photos of the Ferris Wheel, the hospital, the grapehitti on the walls. Even in town I look for places that I shouldnt go into, simply because I want to photograph it, because i want to see the beauty in decay.